As you and your spouse discuss your retirement plans, one of you may discover a reduced tolerance for a work situation that is no longer fulfilling your needs or one that is inconsistent with your values. And priorities may need to shift if your health and well-being are undermined.

Here’s Steve and Carol’s story:

Carol and Steve first talked about retirement in their late fifties, focusing primarily on financial goals. They agreed to continue working and retire together when they were both sixty-five. In her early sixties, Carol’s company reorganized, and she was transferred to a new division where she was doing work that was neither interesting nor satisfying. She felt like she had been demoted, and resented being supervised by someone younger and less experienced.

Frustrated and unhappy, Carol began to dread going to work. Steve was aware of the situation, but he had no idea how close Carol was to quitting. At sixty-two, she could not imagine staying at her job another three years, even though leaving would mean losing health insurance coverage, which had been a big issue in their discussion about when to retire. Steve planned to sell his small but successful accounting business when he retired. He enjoyed his work and rarely complained. But Carol’s job was draining her energy and giving her little more than a paycheck.

Carol and Steve needed to revisit their timetable for retirement and decide how to resolve the dilemma. Their situation is an example of how life can bring changes that affect decision making.

Couples need to start talking about retirement well before they get there, and then reassess their decisions as circumstances change. Even the best plan may need to be revised. Carol was unhappy and disappointed. She wanted to leave her job but felt stuck, primarily because she depended on her health insurance benefit. Carol and Steve needed to talk about whether she had to “stick it out” until they were both eligible for Medicare, or whether it was possible for her to leave her job sooner.

Perhaps there were also other options they had not yet considered:

Carol and Steve talked about their priorities and did some problem solving together, which helped Carol feel supported and more open to possibilities. Steve encouraged her to talk with her boss about how her experience and skills might be utilized in another part of the company. They agreed that if a transfer was not possible, they would find a way to pay for COBRA for eighteen months, which would give them time to figure out what to do.

As it turned out, Carol’s boss liked her creative thinking and offered her a part-time position that was new and interesting. Although health care benefits would not be fully covered, it was a good compromise and well worth Carol’s peace of mind. She and Steve still planned to retire together at sixty-five, but with a somewhat different plan. Meanwhile, working part time gave Carol the opportunity to begin taking courses and explore new interests.

As you and your partner determine your decision about whether to work after retirement, make sure your decisions will not jeopardize your financial security.  While the issue is universal, the solutions are particular to you and your situation. Making important decisions is an ongoing process. As we have seen with Carol and Steve, what you’ve planned for may change when circumstances change. Having accurate information and facts and talking about how you feel will help you make decisions you’re able to live with.